Work harder at paying attention to your blessings.
Know that those sent to you, who seem to evoke your pain, bring your darkness to the surface, are blessings. It won’t seem like this at the time. At the time the lessons and level of pain you experience will feel excruciating, especially if you are in the process of rewriting your internal narrative. Letting the past go is painful and although having a blank slate is necessary, when feelings arise that you previously avoided due to living in a state of numbness – a coping mechanism that is no longer serving you, take your time working through these feelings. Do your best to express yourself to others however in the first instance it’s important you understand yourself, for yourself.
Keep going, keep working through the pain. Say thank you for the lessons you’re learning. Know that you can be in a greater place in a shorter amount of time, if you start to open the doors that for so long you have kept hidden inside you.
Sometimes you have to learn the hard way. Sometimes you’re so accustomed to love being difficult, that a love that’s easy doesn’t make any sense. If you hold the belief that you’re unlovable extremely close to heart, then it takes so much courage and effort to explore this incorrect notion. Do the work – You’re worth it! Face the hurdles that come your way, you need them.
As the saying goes: Appreciate what you have, before time teaches you to appreciate what you had.
Remember to be gentle with yourself when your internal narrative is mean and always remember to say thank you to those who help you – especially if they don’t necessarily know they have done so. When you feel like giving up keep going, you can overcome all your hurdles! Continue to push through your journey and remember to have hope. Always apologise to those you know you hurt and not just vocally, prove you’re sorry with action. Life can be bitter sweet and before you know it, you can lose something special due to your mindset because you were unable to even acknowledge that you had something special in the first place, you were unable to believe that you could have all you ever asked for and more. This is stemming from a place of feeling unworthy and undeserving but you are worthy and you are deserving. Self Reflection and Self Forgiveness are two of the many keys to your growth.
Offer yourself forgiveness for your lack of gratitude but be greatful that each experience uncovers layers of rotting self, layers that you must shed in order to elevate yourself. Offer yourself love and allow yourself to feel your sadness. Avoidance is never the answer. Changing your perspective is a requirement and a crucial choice, in order for you to move forward.
No matter the pain, know you won’t always be met with pain at this level and remember, even the rain has a purpose. In time you will blossom and glow.
Sending light and love, ALWAYS x